Awakening....

Yesterday was hard...harder than I thought. After going to the smallest funeral home I've ever been to and standing an hour and a half out in the frigid cold before I was even able to reach the door and then stood another hour inside before I got to see Peggy. I would have stood out there even longer if need be though to be honest. Though I hadn't seen her in about 3 years when I saw her I just started crying and told her how sorry I was and she just hugged me and cried...it was just so hard. I apologized for not seeing her sooner. I walked away and on the ride home I just felt so guilty...guilty for letting our friendship go by the wayside just because we didn't work together anymore. Allowing life to get in the way. I felt so bad and so selfish. I need to change...my life needs to change...I need to quit allowing life to happen to me and start living it with a purpose...not sail through it...take it by the horns and say this is the way I'm going...with God's direction of course. No more mediocre. No more staying in my cocoon...It's time for me to get out of my box and face life head on. It's time to become that butterfly! Time to unclutter my life with the meaningless things. Talk about a wake up call...

On another note, nothing like a funeral to see how much someone touched people's lives. Never saw so many people at a set of calling hours in my life. Unbelieveable.

So...I'm drawing the line in the sand today...hold me accountable...it's time for a change and that change is NOW!